Fear of the dentist is far more common than many people admit. For some, it’s a mild unease. For others, it is a deep, overwhelming fear that can prevent them from seeking care for years — sometimes decades. This fear is real, valid, and deserves compassion, not judgment.
At Gentle Dental, fear is not dismissed. It is understood.
With 36 years of clinical experience, Dr Jane Okongo has worked extensively with phobic patients, including individuals with autism, anxiety disorders, depression, PTSD, and those carrying the weight of childhood dental trauma. Many arrive believing they are “difficult patients.” They are not. They are human.
Where Dental Fear Often Begins
For many people, dental fear begins early. A painful childhood experience, feeling unheard, being rushed, restrained, or shamed can leave a lasting imprint. Others develop fear later in life after a traumatic medical or personal experience.
In patients with autism or other neurodivergent conditions, the dental environment itself can feel overwhelming — unfamiliar sounds, bright lights, close physical proximity, loss of control, or difficulty processing sensations.
Mental health challenges can intensify this fear. Anxiety magnifies anticipation. Depression can drain motivation. Trauma can cause the body to react even when the mind wants to cooperate.
None of this is weakness. It is the nervous system trying to protect itself.
What Fear Looks Like in the Dental Chair
Fear doesn’t always look like panic. Sometimes it shows up as:
• cancelling appointments repeatedly
• delaying treatment until pain becomes severe
• becoming very quiet or withdrawn
• excessive talking to avoid treatment
• feeling embarrassed about the condition of one’s teeth
• physical symptoms such as sweating, nausea, shaking, or rapid heartbeat
Over the years, Dr Okongo has learned that listening is often the most important part of treatment.
A Different Approach to Dental Care
With decades of experience treating anxious and phobic patients, Dr Jane Okongo’s approach is built on trust, patience, and control — given back to the patient.
This means:
• explaining procedures slowly and clearly
• never rushing treatment
• allowing patients to stop at any time
• adapting techniques to sensory sensitivities
• creating predictability for patients who need structure
• respecting emotional boundaries
For patients with autism or mental health challenges, care is tailored — not forced into a standard mould.
Sometimes the first visit is just a conversation. And that is enough.
Healing Dental Trauma Takes Time — and Safety
Many patients carry shame about their teeth, especially if fear has kept them away from care. At Gentle Dental, shame has no place.
Dr Okongo has treated patients who had avoided dentists for 10, 20, even 30 years. With gentle care, reassurance, and consistency, many are eventually able to receive treatment they once believed was impossible.
Healing happens when patients feel:
• seen
• believed
• respected
• safe
Dentistry should never re-traumatise.
Dentistry for Neurodivergent and Vulnerable Patients
Experience matters deeply when treating patients with autism or complex mental health needs. Small details — tone of voice, pace, environment, clarity — make a profound difference.
Dr Okongo’s long experience allows her to recognise when a patient needs:
• more time
• fewer stimuli
• a different explanation
• reassurance rather than persuasion
This is not something learned from textbooks. It is learned from years of caring for real people.
A Message to Anyone Afraid Right Now
If you are afraid of the dentist, you are not alone. Your fear is understandable. And you deserve care that meets you where you are — not where someone thinks you should be.
At Gentle Dental, the goal is not just to treat teeth, but to protect dignity, restore trust, and move at your pace.
Sometimes the bravest step is simply walking through the door. And sometimes even that can wait — until you feel ready.
Final Thoughts
Fear of the dentist is not something to “get over.” It is something to be understood, respected, and gently worked through with the right support.
With 36 years of experience, including extensive care for phobic patients, individuals with autism, mental health challenges, and childhood trauma, Dr Jane Okongo offers dentistry rooted in compassion, patience, and deep understanding.
At Gentle Dental, fear is not an obstacle — it is part of the conversation. If and when you are ready, you will be met with care, not pressure.
